Zionist Conspiracy

Let's Make More Global Warming!
30 Tishrei 5768, 12 October 07 02:51by "Back to Sanity" - Arutz 7
Analysts(IsraelNN.com)

For years most of us have believed that the Nobel Peace Prize could not
possibly be debased any worse than it has been. Shimon Peres and mass
murderer Yassir Arafat were granted a Nobel "Peace Prize" for plunging the
Middle East into an endless cycle of terrorist aggression against Israel
and for putting Israel's very survival into jeopardy. Arafat's share of
the loot was used to buy weapons. True, the decision to elect Peres as
President of Israel is so much more absurd that the Nobel Committee looks
lucid in comparison. The only "peace" the Prize really celebrates is that
where Arafat now Rests In.

And theirs wasn't even the only Orwellian award of the Peace Prize.
Bishop Desmond Tutu, who thinks the Israel Lobby is a manifestation of
Nazism and supports anti-Jewish terror, also got the award. For years
Israel's Moonbatocracy has been trying to nominate Uri Avnery, Israel's
Lord Haw-Haw, for one. Israeli communists have been promoting terrorist
accomplice Tali Fahima for one.

But the decision to grant a Nobel Peace prize to Whacky Al Gore for his
environmentalist hysterics and pseudo-scientific posturing must surely
rival the earlier absurdities. Gore, who was defeated in the Presidential
election even though he tried to steal it by only recounting the ballots
in his favor in Florida, is also the guy who claims to have invented the
internet. He has reinvented himself in recent years as a groupie of
radical environmentalist nuttiness.

It seems that whenever countries get too rich and comfortable, their
chattering classes starting wringing their hands over the environment. It
is part of the price those countries pay for not having more serious
national problems and challenges.

"Global Warming" has become the leading pseudo-cause of those practicing
recreational compassion, people looking for a cheap way to impress their
friends and neighbors about how caring they are. Recycling bins on their
lawns are their version of a PC creche. As P. J. O'Rourke said, everyone
wants to save the planet but no one wants to help Mom do the dishes.

Global warning is the cause celebre of the moral posturers, except when
they are warning us about the dangers of global cooling (and there are
many who still do THAT!). They discover thinning ice shields in the polar
regions except in the areas where it is getting thicker. They chant the
mantra that George Bush and America's refusal to sign the Kyoto Protocol
are behind the warming and the hurricanes. Of course, if the earth is
really getting a smidgen warmer it has nothing to do with humans. Mars is
getting warmer and its ice caps are melting a bit. Gore will no doubt
attribute that to selfish Republicans as well.

I have always thought that the idea that humans can change a planet's
climate is a bit of megalomania. While there is doubt as to whether
global warming is even taking place, there is no doubt at all that humans
- if it is for real - have nothing to do with it.

The global warming hysteria also ignores the many benefits and positive
aspects of global warming. Even those who are convinced beyond a doubt
that it is occurring agree that its main manifestation is slightly warmer
winter nights. Since my heating system does not work very well, I for one
would welcome warmer winter nights. No one knows how warmer climate
affects rainfall but it is likely to cause more of it, and that surely is
good for Israel, and the British would deserve it!

Ever since the first shrieks about global warming were heard, I have been
checking the beaches of Haifa, hoping to see a visible sign of some rise
in ocean surface levels. But alas, not even a bit. On the other hand,
all those tales about tropical orchids growing at the North Poll are
actually reasons for celebration!

There are so many benefits from global warming, I think it behooves all of
us to do our parts to create more of it!

First, if the ice pack over Greenland really does melt, this might be a
nice place to create a "Palestinian state." The terrorists could undergo
career reorientation and take to cod fishing. They could throw grenades
at whales. Ahmedinejad and his ayatollahs could visit there, as a
substitute for Alaska, where they want to send all the Jews.

Second, I can see numerous benefits for the world from any rise in ocean
surface levels. It would solve most of the problems of the Middle East!

Flooding the Gaza Strip with ocean water due to rising sea levels would
surely stop the Kassam rockets. Now THAT is something worth buying an SUV
over in order to achieve! True, some other areas might be inundated. But
what is wrong with Ramat Aviv being under some nice sea water? The
leftist yuppies in the upper floors of their buildings would not be
affected and would get capital gains on their oceanfront property. The
others could simply relocate and make aliya to Eretz Yisrael, getting new
homes in Gush Etzion, Efrat and Ariel.

Elsewhere, rising sea levels would erase Venice, California, and Santa
Cruz. The hills in Berkeley where the employed professionals live would
be safe, but the Berkeley lowlands where the radicals posture and protest
would be eliminated. The more I think about it, the more I like the idea!

Israel is so small that it cannot be seen on most global maps. But even
so, we really should be doing more in order to hasten global warming.
Cutting taxes on imports of SUV would be a good place to start and would
also lower the traffic fatality rate.

So let's do our part to hasten global warming! A Nobel Peace Prize may be
in it for us!

# posted by Steven Plaut : 5:57 AM