Monday, March 18, 2013

Anti-Semitic Haggadah Available Now

Well, if you were looking for an alternative way to "celebrate"
Passover this you, I suppose one of your options would be to use the
new pro-terror anti-Semitic jihadist Passover Haggadah prepared by the
anti-Israel "Jewish Voices for Peace" cult. You can see the
"Haggadah" in full here: . The
"Haggadah" is the project of the JVP pseudo-rabbi, one Brant Rosen.
(He runs an anti-Israel blog here: , which links
to some of the most anti-Semitic web sites on the planet). Brant has
a Reconstructionist "ordination" - I think he got it from Rolling
Stone Magazine - and heads some sort of Recon-Deconstructionist ashram
in Evanston, Illinois. Brant is basically a Mikey Lerner on steroids.
I am pretty sure a Hamas flag flies over his "shul."

To give you a sampling from his "Haggadah," the "Ten Plagues"
there all refer to supposed mistreatment of the Palestinians by Israel
(things like "profiteering" - whatever that is, political prisoners
and settlements). The Seder plate includes an Orange – "Symbolizing
building Jewish community where women, queer, and transgender people
are welcomed and recognized as full valued participants." You know,
a fruit that can be squeezed? The text is peppered with citations
from Moslem terrorists and from the Koran. There is at least one open
call for Islamic terrorism, a "poem" entitled "Revenge." The entire
Dayenu, renamed the Nakba Dayenu, is about supposed acts of evil done
by Israel against poor innocent Arabs. There are endorsements for
boycotts and divestments against Israel in the text, and the entire
third cup of wine is a salute to the BDS aggression against Israel.
There is a special section on "pinkwashing," the nonsense term used by
the Fascist Left to refer to people praising Israel for the tolerance
there towards homosexuals. The "Next Year in Jerusalem" theme of
course is an endorsement for the "Palestinian Right of Return." And
of course the real message of Passover is that no one should dream of
attacking Iran or disrupting its plans to nuke the Jews..

If you would like to sit on your digital camera and then send Brant
a cyber-moon, his email address is

The Tikkun crowd is only slightly less wacky than the Evanston
Reconstructionist pagans. Here is a reprint of what sort of Passover
Seder you should be running according to Rabbi Cheech and Rabbi Chong
(Lerner and Waskow), the ADMOR-im of this important school of

This Year Make Your Passover Seder a Multi-Galactic One

Important Passover Message from Mikey Lerner and the Entire Staff of
Tikkun Magazine, the Jewish New Age pro-LSD Magazine:

A few years back, Tikkun's Rabbi Arthur Woodstock issued a call to
make it a multicultural Passover Seder that year: in other words, a
mix of Judaism and PC paganism.

Rabbi Woodstock, above
Well, this year Tikkun magazine has issued a new call for all Jews:
You all should make yours a Multi-Galactic Seder!!!!
Yes, this is the year to invite assorted beings from other planets to
your spacey politically-correct Seder, to prove your devotion to
multi-galactic understanding and stamping out speciesism along with
SUVs. The guests will join in and participate in the many traditional
Tikkunesque Passover traditions.
First, the Seder begins with the washing of the hands, or, in the case
of visitors from Vulcan, the tentacles. Then the guests dine on lamb's
legs made from vegan tofu. The Seder ends with the munching of
traditional holiday Tikkun macaroons, made out of matzos flour and
hashish. Served on recyclable dinner bowls.

Now to help make your Tikkun Passover multi-galactic Seder complete,
"Rabbis" Arthur Woodstock and Michael of Meaning have rewritten the
Passover song "Who knows One?"
Here is how the new version will go:

Who knows One? I know One!
One is the greatest rabbi of all time, the Rebbe Jerry Garcia, Shlita.
Who knows Two? I know Two!
Two is Rabbi Cheech and Rabbi Chong, who seem to write most of the
articles for Tikkun magazine. (Alternative version - Two is Two States
for Two Peoples: the Jordanian "people" and the Palestinian "people.")
Who knows Three? I know Three!
Three is the number of square meters Israel should be left with after
adopting policies advocated by Tikkun.
Who knows Four? I know Four!
Four is the greatest sages of Torah learning of all time, according to
Tikkun: Rabbis John, Paul, George and Ringo.
Who knows Five? I know Five!
Five is the five genders officially proclaimed by Hillary (back when
Lerner was her temporary guru of Meaning) at the International
Wymmyn's Conference in Beijing, fully endorsed by Tikkun.
Who knows Six? I know Six!
Six is the SIX-TIES, my Heavy Tikkun Dude!
Who knows Seven? I know Seven!
Seven is the seven basic nutritional groups required to make you a
happy and healthy progressive, namely: cannabis, marijuana, hashish,
pot, weed, grass, and dope.
Who knows Eight? I know Eight!
Eight is the number of people who really read Tikkun magazine.
Who knows nine? I know nine!
Nine is the number of people on earth who actually regard Mikey Lerner
as a rabbi.
Who knows ten? I know ten!
Ten is the median IQ score for Tikkun readers.
Who knows eleven? I know eleven!
Eleven is the number of the Eleventh Commandment: "Thou Shalt Be Trendy!"
Who knows twelve? I know twelve!
Twelve is the number of times Michael Lerner can say "loving and
caring" in one minute (the fewest number of times, that is).
Who knows thirteen? I know thirteen!
Thirteen is the number of sentences from the entire Bible that Tikkun
editors have actually read.

Michael of Meaning, Rabbi Moonbeam, above

Oh, and you can read the Oslo Dayenu here:

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