Thursday, January 16, 2014
A Message sent to the University of Haifa faculty
From me.
As you know, a third of the entire faculty at the University of Haifa signed a statement denouncing their own university for denying an honorary PhD to Nobelist Prof. Robert Aumann because the University officials dislike his personal political opinions, which tend towards the non-PC. Aside from those signing, a minority of Haifa University faculty members from the Ultra-Left have been swamping the chat lists and the media with their own explanations of why Aumann was undeserving of the honor. After all, he holds opinions that they regard as unenlightened and bigoted. They have also been making mega noise inside the University.
You humble curmudgeon posted the following message to the entire University today to shut these varmints up:
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Anyone who really think that they understand American culture will be familiar with the great commentator Jeff Foxworthy. He is from the Deep South, and has built a career on making clever one-liners poking fun at those from his world. He is best known for his comedy shticks based on the refrain, "Then you just might be a redneck." For
example, if you have 24 pickup trucks and none of them work, then you just might be a redneck. That sort of thing.
example, if you have 24 pickup trucks and none of them work, then you just might be a redneck. That sort of thing.
Well, I think Jeff Foxworthy should be officially invited to and hosted by the University of Haifa. In fact, he should be granted an honorary PhD. And while he receives it, he could do a performance based on a slight alteration of his best-known shtick. It would be a commentary on those people "who just might be Israeli leftwing fascists."
Here are some samples from his upcoming performance:
1. If you think that Prof. Robert Aumann is insufficiently enlightened or ethical to get an honorary PhD at the University of of Haifa but Shulamit Aloni was decidedly entitled to one, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
2. If you think that it is the purpose of institutions of higher learning to indoctrinate students into correct radical leftist ideology, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
3. If Haaretz represents your idea of balanced pluralism and diversity of ides, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
4. If you think that non-leftists should be denied freedom of expression because they hold incorrect opinions, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist. If you signed that petition against allowing Colonel Pnina Sharbit Baruch to teach at Tel Aviv University, there is no doubt left.
5. If you think books containing opinions you consider to be bigoted or ignorant should be burned, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
6. If you think everyone who disagrees with the radical Left is a fascist, then it is pretty clear that you are an Israeli leftwing fascist.
7. If you consider Im Tirtzu to be a fascist organization, then there is no doubt that you are an Israeli leftwing fascist.
8. If you consider Zeev Sternhell, Shlomo Sand, Rivka Feldhay, and Oren Yiftachel to be serious scholars and academics, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
9. If you claim that Ariella Azoulay was turned down for tenure at Bar Ilan because of her political opinions, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
10. If you claim that Yitzhak Rabin was murdered because of the exercise of freedom of speech by non-leftists, and so it must be suppressed as a clear and present danger, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
11. If you think it is racist when some rabbis call for people not to rent property to Arabs, but it is a progressive gesture for peace and tolerance to demand that property not be rented or sold to Jews in Sheikh Jarrah and Silwan because Jews do not belong there, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
12. If you think Israel is an apartheid regime, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
13. If you think that rabbis calling for people not to rent property to Arabs is racist, but Sheikh Salah's rant at the University of Haifa calling for Arab students to become suicide bombers was not, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
14. If you think that international pressure on Israel to make peace by accepting terms rejected by the majority of Israelis is necessary and valuable, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
15. If you think that students displaying posters and tee shirts with images of Abdul Nasser, Che Guevara, and bin Laden is legitimate protest but Im Tirtzu students wearing tee shirts with images of Herzl is fascism, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
16. If you think that faculty members should have the right to cheer on terrorism against Jews, to call for Israel's obliteration, to support lawbreaking, to call for international boycotts against Israel, and to call for Israelis to refuse to serve in the military, while at the same time you consider anyone who CRITICIZES those same faculty members for doing those things to be "McCarthyists," then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
17. If you think Ami Ayalon is a centrist and should have the power to decide what is an acceptable opinion for an academic to hold, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
18. If you deny that Noam Chomsky's endorsements of Holocaust Deniers are anti-Semitism, or claim that Chomsky never served as the apologist for the Khmer Rouge, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
19. If you think it is fascist to criticize the New Israel Fund and its officers, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
20. If you think Israel owes Turkey an "apology" for its takeover of the Gaza flotilla ships, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
21. If you see nothing wrong with the Department of Politics at Ben Gurion University serving as a monolithic anti-Israel propaganda and indoctrination center, and if you believe that the international panel of experts calling for shutting it down altogether were fascists, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
22. If you think shooting terrorists constitutes "war crimes," then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
23. If you believe that the only legitimate way for Israel to defend its citizens against terrorism is to capitulate to the demands of the terrorists, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
24. If you find it perfectly reasonable when the heads of the Palestinian Authority insist that no Jews be allowed to live in any future Palestinian state but consider it racism when Lieberman proposes transferring control of Umm al-Fahm to the PA, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
25. If you insist that there are no lessons to be learned from the 10,000 rockets fired at Israel after Israel abandoned the Gaza Strip, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
26. If you see nothing objectionable when people in Ramat Aviv demand that Chabadniks and other Orthodox be kept out, but are horrified when residents of Shchunat Hatikva object to the presence of illegal Africans, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
27. If you claim that Israel conducts ethnic cleansing or genocide, then it is certain that are an Israeli leftwing fascist
28. If you think the University of Haifa should have a Christmas tree, but that Jews should be prevented from praying on the Temple Mount, then you just might be an Israeli leftwing fascist.
29. If you endorse the international BDS warfare aggression against Israel and its institutions, then we all know what you are.
# posted by Steven Plaut : 9:39 AM
