Sunday, January 26, 2014
Toilet Economics
Arik Sharon died recently and I suppose manners prevents the indictment of him at this point for all the political errors and misdeeds he did when he morphed into Israel's appeaser of the barbarians. We can settle that score some other time. Instead, I thought I would re-post a 30 year old item of my own poking fun at Sharon back when Sharon was serving as Minister of Commerce in the Israeli government of 1984 (interesting year that!)
To raise the national spirits, I am here posting sections from my very
first newspaper article about Ariel Sharon, printed in the Jerusalem Post
on Oct 16 1984. Sharon at the time was the Minister of Industry and Trade
in the Shamir Incompetocracy:
Toilet Economics
By Steven Plaut
Readers with a highly developed sense of delicacy are warned not to read
this commentary. We will be dealing with a HIGHLY indelicate subject. We
will be discussing a central concern of the latest version of the
government's economic policy.
It seems the major issue for that policy is the matter of those large
round ceramic household fixtures through which water passes intermittently
and which back in kindergarten days we used to call Happy Johnnies. There,
I have said it. Yes, the government of Israel has decided to fight the
continuing deterioration of our economy by crusading against imported
Happy Johnnies.
In recent days Ariel Sharon on behalf of the government announced that he
was totally banning all imports of Happy Johnnies and 54 other items for a
period of six months. These items were enumerated in what was called a
"list of luxury goods". Now THINK about that for a moment. Happy Johnnies
are LUXURY goods?
The fact that Ariel Sharon so regards them says volumes about his own
lifestyle and perhaps his early toilet training. It is one thing to fight
foreign reserve losses by prohibiting shaving cream imports, ALSO on the
list of prohibited items. After all, what is wrong with Jews growing
beards? But Happy Johnnies? That is really hitting the public below the
belt!
In fairness, one should point out that it was only imports of CERAMIC
Johnnies that were prohibited. No one said anything about, say, wooden
ones. But I, for one, am opposed to those. After all, how would it be if
Israel became known as the Birch John Society? Ariel Sharon gets a grade
for his polices of 00!!
History has tended to attach labels to the economic programs of various
administrations. Roosevelt had his "New Deal". Johnson had the "Great
Society". Aridor had "Correct Economics". Well, Ariel Sharon will go down
in the history books as the father of Toilet Economics.
first newspaper article about Ariel Sharon, printed in the Jerusalem Post
on Oct 16 1984. Sharon at the time was the Minister of Industry and Trade
in the Shamir Incompetocracy:
Toilet Economics
By Steven Plaut
Readers with a highly developed sense of delicacy are warned not to read
this commentary. We will be dealing with a HIGHLY indelicate subject. We
will be discussing a central concern of the latest version of the
government's economic policy.
It seems the major issue for that policy is the matter of those large
round ceramic household fixtures through which water passes intermittently
and which back in kindergarten days we used to call Happy Johnnies. There,
I have said it. Yes, the government of Israel has decided to fight the
continuing deterioration of our economy by crusading against imported
Happy Johnnies.
In recent days Ariel Sharon on behalf of the government announced that he
was totally banning all imports of Happy Johnnies and 54 other items for a
period of six months. These items were enumerated in what was called a
"list of luxury goods". Now THINK about that for a moment. Happy Johnnies
are LUXURY goods?
The fact that Ariel Sharon so regards them says volumes about his own
lifestyle and perhaps his early toilet training. It is one thing to fight
foreign reserve losses by prohibiting shaving cream imports, ALSO on the
list of prohibited items. After all, what is wrong with Jews growing
beards? But Happy Johnnies? That is really hitting the public below the
belt!
In fairness, one should point out that it was only imports of CERAMIC
Johnnies that were prohibited. No one said anything about, say, wooden
ones. But I, for one, am opposed to those. After all, how would it be if
Israel became known as the Birch John Society? Ariel Sharon gets a grade
for his polices of 00!!
History has tended to attach labels to the economic programs of various
administrations. Roosevelt had his "New Deal". Johnson had the "Great
Society". Aridor had "Correct Economics". Well, Ariel Sharon will go down
in the history books as the father of Toilet Economics.
# posted by Steven Plaut : 12:47 AM
