Thursday, March 19, 2015
Career Ideas for Zehava Galon
1. If Obama really wanted Netanyahu to lose, he should have endorsed him!
2. Special message for Livni:
3. Dear Mr. Herzog:
I want my money back!!
Signed, Barack H. Obama
4. Ah the crybaby Israeli Left. The media - as usual when the Right wins - are carrying stories about Israeli lefties preparing to leave the country, such as those moving to Germany where the chocolate pudding is cheaper. We all need to bid such people bon voyage. We also need to re-read the classic article about AMerican leftists fleeing the US for Canada every time the Conservatives there are victorious:
"Build a Damn Fence!"
From The Manitoba Herald , Canada ;
by Clive Runnels, December 1st 2010
The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration. The recent actions of the Tea Party are prompting an exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray, and to agree with Bill O'Reilly and Glenn Beck.
Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield , whose acreage borders North Dakota . The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken. When I said I didn't have any, he left before I even got a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"
In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. He then installed loudspeakers that blared Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through and Rush annoyed the cows so much that they wouldn't give any milk."
Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons and drive them across the border where they are simply left to fend for themselves." A lot of these people are not prepared for our rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a single bottle of imported drinking water. They did have a nice little Napa Valley Cabernet, though."
When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about plans being made to build re-education camps where liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.
In recent days, liberals have turned to ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have been disguised as senior citizens taking a bus trip to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans in powdered wig disguises, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior citizens about Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney to prove that they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we become very suspicious about their age." an official said.
Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and are renting all the Michael Moore movies "I really feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them." an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"
5. Israel's leftist losers:
7. Poor Yair Garbuz and Yehoshua Sobol
Seems the Mezuza Kissers won!
8. The polls were predicting 20-21 seats for the Likud. The Likud got 30 seats. A 50% error. Conclusions?
9. AN even bigger reason to celebrate? Zehava Galon, the Madame Defarge of Meretz, is on the way out! She announced she is resigning.
New career ideas for Zehava:
1. She can be the new Dean of Gender Studies at the University of Teheran.
2. She can grew side curls and join the Neturei Karta.
3. She can be Avrum Burg's maid in France.
4. She can get a job tearing squares of toilet paper on Friday afternoons for Ramat Aviv area synagogues, before the sabbath.
5. She can join SHAS.
6. She can serve as designated driver for when Mel Gibson gets drunk.
7. She can be the chief pimp for the "Women in Black".
8. She can test explosives belts for the Hamas.
9. She can serve as pothole filler.
10. She can get tenured at Ben Gurion University.